Thursday, October 15, 2020

I Need the Mercy of the Lord.

 I already briefed you that there is a shift in my prayer nowadays. And I note some changes in my life. Earlier I used to pray to make me a millionaire. I thought, enjoying the life of a millionaire remain the most significant life. Presently I appreciate the giver than the gift. Therefore, I pray that God please come and lives within me. While I am praying this prayer, my inner being told me that I am neither worthy to receive the Spirit of God nor worthy for God to live within me.

That means I have done a lot of sin in my life. I am not in proper shape for the Lord to come and live within me. There are a lot of immoral things in my life. The thing that God detests. He is a pure God. He can live only in an innocent heart. And I am over here with a dirty heart and mind. My thoughts are dirty. And I am over here with a dirty heart and mind. My heart is dirty. My hand is filthy. I am covered with sin. (Sin means all kinds of sin, I am ashamed to record it out here) I am in a terrible state.

I don't know how I dare to ask God to come and live within me. I am nothing but like a pig that love to roll around in the mud. I need to undergo a cleansing process. Washing, inside out, with high-quality detergent. I doubt many of the stains would not go easily. It will take time and effort to make it clean and pure. One by one the events of my life, filthy life comes into my thought.

From my childhood, till now, I did countless sins. I started to steal coins from my mother for buying sweets. Next, I took money from the pocket of my father. I picked mango on the way back from my school. The list goes on. I am ashamed to tell all the sins I have done in my life. My ways were incorrect. My intentions were immoral. Always I think about myself. I never thought about others.

I wish, if I could reverse my life, I would not do many sins which I have done in my life. Briefly, I am not worthy to receive the Holy Spirit. I am not worthy to seek God to come and live within me. In the present circumstances, it is up to God to cleanse me. He needs to show extraordinary kindness to cleanse me. I am certain He will show extraordinary kindness towards me. I remember Jesus shed his blood for my sins. Now I constantly am praying My Lord, please cleanse me with the blood of your son Jesus. Just like Paul, I could merely say that "What a wretched man I am! Who will rescue me from this body of death? Thanks to Jesus and his sacrifice. Through which I could go to my Lord.

I am praying to the Lord. Lord please forgive my sins. Cleanse me. Make me clean and pure. Make me a vessel of you! Come and live within me. Give me a pure heart. Give me a worthy heart for you to dwell in.

My heart is troubled now. It will be heavy until it is cleansed by the blood of Jesus. I need Jesus and his love. I want Him to fill my heart with His love. I desire the presence of my Lord in my heart. Nothing more than that. Nothing less than that.

I request all of you to pray for me. Therefore, God has mercy upon me. God cherishes me. God have mercy upon me. Cleanse me. Make me pure and holy.

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