Raise Your Standards.

It's hard not to look back on the years past and reflect on how different everything is now.  Listened to the radio for many hours. I never let one of those weekly magazines without reading cover to cover. (regional weekly which has full of novels and stories) I was an addict to such erotic and giggling stories and novels. Subsequently, I was waiting for the following issue of the weekly. I put off my studies on red novels and magazines. I read the newspaper as much as I can. My interest was in those things which will not put stress in my brain. I have to put more focus and attention to studies, that is why I hate doing it. Memorizing equations and phrases, I hate to do. Listening to music, sitting idle and daydreaming become my hobby and habit.

Falling in exams was my constant companion, and I used to it. The thought of "I am not good at studies" ruled my brain. I hate my textbooks. I attempted many tricks to get more marks, an in-class exam by writing twice the answers which I am sure of, one in the beginning and the other at the middle or end. I fooled my teacher a few times but caught one day. Due to the pressure of parents, I went to school every day. I loved Saturdays and Sundays. I devoted a lot of time with my friends in the river swimming and playing. We had fun in the water as well as in the field. I recall the phrase where the Bible says about Israelites who were in the desert. The bible says, "They sat down to eat and drink and got up to indulge in revelry." I was that and that was my life.

My parents sent me to extra tuition. The tuition teacher tried her level best to teach me. Many times I decided to study well. But failed to keep my promise. My mother woke me up early morning at 4.00 am to study, but while I look at my textbook, I was dreaming about girls. I was in a fantasy world. Full of dreams and imaginations. Not ordinary dreams, but wild dreams. Not constructive dreams, but destructive dreams. In my erotic thoughts, all the ladies come including my teacher, and aunts, and the ladies around our locality. That was accurate to me.

Looking back to those days, in the present circumstances, I realize that I was mistaken. I could have put more effort to do my studies and get an excellent grade and go for higher studies and could have gained a degree. But I failed to do so. Moreover, I went to another town for employment. I got a job as an office boy in a travel agency. My duty was to bring tickets and deliver them to customers. Doing photocopies and all other odd jobs. I was not good at my attitude. Even though I was working there, I was dreaming about girls. A bizarre life. I was addicted to the behavior of looking at girls with immoral intentions. I was reluctant to look at the face of people. Not open to people. Because I was frightened that if I open my mouth, everyone would know about me. I was leading a pathetic life.

Stealing eatables, from wherever I get a chance, was my habit. In my home, I used to do that. I stole money from my mother and father. Stealing fruits from another yard was my habit.

I was stealing money as well as things from the place where I worked. One day I caught and dismissed from my job. It has been a turning point in my life. Next, I struggled to get a job. Did a part-time data entry job in the night. I perceived the value of education. Also, the value of conducting an honorable and righteous life. Right now I have a decent job and an excellent family.

Now I realize that success will not come to idle, unethical, or unjust people. Those people will stay where they are. No growth. No change. No hope. No happiness. Only uncertainty and unhappiness. You could not expect a more satisfactory life. Better future or better end.

When I realize that I am a total failure, I decided to change. Many people supported me to change. People at Church. People at the office. And the Internet and self-help books and many motivating websites. Then I studied shorthand and typewriting to get a good position. I spent many hours typing and learning shorthand. I changed jobs many times. I completed my graduation in the first division.

I notice a shift in my behavior now. Now I fear God. Now I know if I take a pencil of Rs.1 from the office, God will take Rs.10 from me in another way. Stealing business is a loss-making business. If I travel without a ticket, there are chances to get caught and pay 10 times more as fine. God has many ways to take out money from me if I gain some money unjustly. It could be getting sick or losing valuable items and He retains many ways to compensate for the money value. I found over the years that staling is a loss-making business and put an end to it.

I am not saying that I am innocent and holy now. I am not innocent. I am not faithful. Many areas in my life need to be changed. I am ashamed of my way of life. I want to change. I want to enjoy an excellent life.

If you want to change, one of the best and foremost things is to set the highest standard for your life. Whatever you do, do it with passion. Set higher standards for your work, family, office, business, studies, and whatever you do. For example, if you are doing business, set that you want to become the best businessman in the world.

I know, if I was not gone through all those odd things, I would not be able to tell you the need for a changed life. Thank God for allowing me to experience all the odd situations.